Since we’ve been discussing how God values both men and women equally and how within marriage men and women are designed to work together as a team, I thought I would share about how Nyron and I relate in our marriage. Nyron is the head of our household, and I submit to his leadership, but the way that works itself out is in mutuality, oneness, and valuing each other and one another’s work.
When I sat down to write this piece I thought about trying to structure it around a specific example of us working together as partners. But I soon realized that trying to pick just one example was futile. Partnership and teamwork characterize our marriage and everything we do as a couple. It’s not that we talk to each other all day, it’s that we approach our life together as a team. Within the framework of teamwork, there are things in which we each take the lead, but the decisions about those areas were made together.
Nyron describes my role as “indispensable.” I am truly his partner in every way. We consult each other on decisions large and small. Whether it’s our weekly calendar or a strategic business decision we discuss it as a team. Nyron considers my opinions and advice critical to making wise decisions. I don’t think he would be comfortable making those decisions without my input. We started a company together three years ago which we jointly own. He is the CEO, and he describes my role as “co-founder and strategic advisor” and is still upset that I haven’t updated my LinkedIn page to adequately reflect my role as he sees it. Although he’s the one with all the corporate experience (I spent the first 7 years of our marriage as a doctoral student in Sociology and then became a stay at home mom after graduating), we make all major business decisions together and he considers my advice critical to the success of the company.
Many of the things I do on a daily basis would be considered “traditionally” female tasks. For example, I am primarily the one responsible for child care, educating our children, meal planning, errand running, cleaning, etc. However, I know that he is willing to jump in on any or all of those things if I need it. Nyron doesn’t devalue any of those tasks and often does them when I have other commitments. Furthermore, we recently decided to switch places one morning a week so I could help our company meet its sales goals. So one morning a week I do research and send emails while he homeschools our oldest, changes diapers, and feeds the kids.
It is a beautiful thing to be a part of a marriage where both partners are striving to contribute to the team and valuing each other’s work equally. Together, as a team, we are working to build a family that will be passionate about serving the Lord for generations, to build a successful company, and to serve the church. Not everyone owns a company together, but life can still afford many opportunities for husbands and wives to plan together and to value each other’s work.